Tosh's Page

Tosh in Malta.Tosh - Malta 1995
Photo: P.McKenzie

Name:

David "Tosh" Thomas

Occupation:

Sales Manager

Hobbies and Interests:

Favourite Bands:

Chemical Brothers, Depeche Mode, Manic Street Preachers, Leftfield, Mansun, Massive Attack, Pink Floyd, The Prodigy, Skunk Anansie, Tori Amos, Underworld

Favourite Movies:

Blade Runner, Dune & Last of the Mohicans

Favourite Authors:

Robert Heinlein, James Herbert, Tom Sharpe,  Michael Moorcock

Motto:

Try anything in life once apart from two things; Homosexuality (PLEASE! no offence intended - I have gay friends but it's just not MY cup of tea) and Morris Dancing

Beliefs:

Fate (It was meant to happen)

Pet Hates:

  • The unemployed who refuse to work
  • Line dancing
  • Pessimists (always look on the bright side of life)
  • People who get up too early (and are still cheerful)
  • Politicians and party political broadcasts
  • Sunday drivers, road works, speed limits, lorries and caravans (You can tell I do a lot of driving in my job, can't you?)
  • Racism, sexism and all other discrimination
  • Bores, couch-potatoes and other sad muppets

Pet Loves:

Happy Muppets

Let me tell you a story...

Once upon a time, a little sparrow flew home south for the winter...but left it too late. His wings froze and he fell to the ground.

Whilst frozen and unable to move, a cow walked over and crapped on him. The dung was warm and despite the unpleasant smell, the heat started to thaw out the little sparrow's wings.

The sparrow was so happy and warm that he started to sing. Just as he was almost ready to fly away again, a third piece of bad luck happened along in the form of a cat, who on hearing his  song promptly licked off all of the dung and ate the sparrow!

The moral of the story is:-

1. Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
2. Not everyone who digs you out of the crap is your friend

So...

If you're warm and happy, no matter how much crap you are in...you should just learn to keep your big trap shut!

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