Two weeks ago today, in the wee hours of Wednesday the 13th of May, my plane touched down in Heathrow and I set foot back on the soil of Blighty for the first time in almost 6 weeks.

It's interesting watching how news and current affairs play out around the world. In Bangkok, the news was all about the political unrest and the riots (it's rather disconcerting to catch a glimpse of the hotel you have just left, between rioters on one side throwing molotov cocktails and armed soldiers on the other firing rubber bullets. In New Zealand the headline stories were about a group of students quarantined with possible swine flu (they all eventually tested negative) and the David Bain murder re-trial. In Hong Kong the news was divided roughly between swine flu concerns and the anniversary of the terrible 2008 Sichuan earthquake.

And what was the lead item in Blighty? Sleazy politicans and their dodgy expense claims.

All things considered I guess we are pretty lucky, though having said that, you don't have to dig very deep to realise that the Westminster oinkers have been taking the proverbial Gypsy's to a fairly monumental degree. Witness the huge range of indefensible claims from claims for cleaning moats to travel expenses exceeding £10,000 per annum. At the current HM Customs and Excise mileage rate of 40p for the first 10,000 miles and 25p for every mile therafter, the worm in question (MP Janet Anderson) would have had to cover 41,000 miles - when the hell did she ever find time for sessions in the house or MP surgeries?

Jan was not alone of course; thieving scumbag-itus seems to have infected most of the commons. The largest expense claims come from from Falkirk MP Eric Joyce, who by his own admission appears to have "overcharged £160,000"!

If you want to see a summary, check out the expenses summary page on the BBC website.

If these bastards were in the private sector, not only would they have been drop-kicked out the door without pay, they would have to answer some rather sticky questions by both HM Customs & excise and the Serious Fraud Office. One or two of them would undoubtedly become very familiar with the phrase: "I have no recollection of that event yer honor".

But they arent in the private sector and they are not subject to the same rules as the rest of us. Which is why a few of them have even had the gall to whine and grizzle about being busted with their snouts in the trough.

...and they wonder why we all despise politicans...

Jaysus!